As I was tagging along while Sophia was biking around the village yesterday, we passed by our neighbor’s house who were nursing a newborn baby. Oh goody, the baby was crying non-stop. Wailing, wailing and wailing some more. Newborn babies have this certain cry, don’t they? A cry so loud and helpless, atleast for me. I can’t help but remember how Sophia would cry at 5:30pm everyday for almost a month when she was about a month old. It drove me nuts, literally. I tried everything to soothe her but nothing seemed to work. She just won’t stop crying. It came to a point where I would just literally wait for her to stop crying all by herself and not try to stop her as I know I can’t no matter how I try. Was that bad? The first few days, I was also in panic mode and would wish to God that the clock won’t strike at 5:30 but as days and weeks passed, I have gotten used to it. Her crying spell would usually last for 30 minutes or so and then she’d sleep. That was her routine everyday for a month.

Now that we’re hoping for baby #2, I can’t help but in a way get all jittery with how I heard my neighbor’s baby cry, wail actually. The cry I heard brought back so many memories. Memories that were mostly hardships that comes with every newborn baby, just to be honest. Some moms would have been so lucky to have babies who never gave then a hard time to begin with but I’m not one of them. Sophia was a real handful when she was a baby. She wouldn’t go near anyone aside from me. She never takes nap for more than an hour. She wanted to be carried all the time. She wakes up at night every three hours – without missing a beat to feed until she was a year old and a half. She cried – a lot. I really had a hard time, true enough. And thinking about all these makes me ask myself if I’m ready again to go through what I went through with her if I ever get pregnant anytime now.

Honestly, at times, I would have second thoughts of wanting to have another baby. Our set up now is so convenient. Sophia’s at the age where we can literally bring her anywhere in the world we please. She’s easier to handle, she understands, she converses with us, she’s nowhere near that crying, helpless baby who only stays in a crib inside a four walled room day in and day out. Just having Sophia would mean Jon and I could travel anywhere whenever we please. Financial wise, it’s going to be a lot easier too. Physically, I would no longer to have to go through those sleepless nights that drove me crazy. Jon and I will be able to go out more often. And the list would go on, on how it’ll be really convenient to have just one kid, Sophia that is. But amidst all of these, we choose to plan for another one.

Why? Because whenever I look at Sophia now and realize how she turned out to be the smart, bubbly and sweet girl that she is and how she brings joy to our lives every single day, I’d definitely tell you without batting an eyelash that every thing’s all worth it. All the hardships that comes along with raising a newborn baby are all temporary and will pass sooner than we think. But the joy our children gives us is going to be forever. Now, who wouldn’t want another one?